I think I'm not only one who has sometimes heard answer "Just be yourself." and got pretty smile after those words. I know that there is people who really mean that but most of the time - they don't. Many times they don't really know you - they don't even want to know you. They might act so but it's all a lie. Behind that smile is "be yourself as long you don't do this and this.." and granted - it's not always the smilers fault that he has learn to think that way. That way to act is everywhere around us and often we are blind to it how it affects our actions and acceptance.
I'm a person what questions everything. It took me a long time to learn question also the society because I was eager to please everyone. Now I just want freedom to be me. And it doesn't mean that I would break any real laws to do so - I still respect those - but often unwritten laws are much stronger.
Are you a bit lost what I'm talking about? Don't worry. I don't blame you about it - but I'm disappointed if you don't start to think about it what I'm going to say. I like to start clearing things out with a question; Why it's so wrong for mans to wear a pretty summer dress?
I recently tumbled on a lot of female body image and males personal image things and I'm glad that finally feels like I'm not only one who questions all of them. This time I try to leave females body image into little less attention and focus more on males own image - and every ones unique personality. Now thinking back to my question - might be that you already thought "Why any man would want to wear a pretty dress!?" or something similar. Let me tell you that there is actually surprisingly many of them - and they are pretty basic heterosexual males. I don't mean that is always the case but as often it is. It doesn't mean they identify themselves always as females or as fags - like society puts it so "politely". Liking of some things doesn't mean that you want to change your sexuality or your gender - even thou most people in society seems to think so. Pretty often I meet some males who - in time - ask me at some form this;"Is it wrong that I like female clothes and sometimes it's nice to put make up on?" I always answer that it isn't wrong and try to say that it's actually amazing that you now tell me who you really are and what you like to do. And same time when I answer to it I always hope that maybe someday they can go out like that without labels and other bad things what come with it. That dream feels pretty hopeless right now.
I have followed one Youtuber some time and she always brings out those society norms and force them to others without even realizing it - at least I hope she doesn't realize it. I don't tell her name but I have to give some examples. Last time when she did that there was some glittery phone cases to be won and because all the jewels and glitter she said that it had to be competition for girls 'cause only girls like that kind of stuff. SAY WHAT!? I were furious! That is so unfair. That already puts down firm rule that if you are a guy you CAN'T LIKE THIS only because you're born into male body. Why? I think everyone has right to like things without rules and limitations of his or her gender.
This isn't even first time she has done something like that - I still remember clearly when she got some gifts to unborn female baby. Those things had to be so called girly princess stuff because all the girls want to be/had to be/are princesses. Why? Why she can't be "manly" Zorro? Her attitude about gender roles is burned into my mind and it hurts a lot.
I know that some might say that these are little things. These so called little things comes big things when idol who you are following say so and/or many other peoples says so. I know that I should give more credit to people that they can think themselves - but it's actually pretty hard to be under the pressure of others. Especially when many young people aren't even been teach to question those things.
Sad thing is that almost nobody don't really want to see or really meet you. They want that only if you're like you should be. They can't handle the truth about you - or often also truth about themselves. They might hide as much as you do.
I know it feels bad but it feels a lot of worst when you aren't honest to yourself - trust me I have been there. And often I go back to there. I would like to say Fuck them! but more than that I would hope that I don't need to say it. It would nice to just freely use and show things I like - it would be nice to see man in summer dress without worrying how "wrong" it is. It's a beautiful thing to hope.
What ever your favorite color is Blue or Pink - it's okay to like one or even both of them. You're the real woman without make up and you're the real man if you cry. Genre roles aren't really anything real - right now they just are the sad reality.
~S ~
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Some good inspiration behind the writing;
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hc45-ptHMx0
